Failure Was An Option

You might remember about a month ago I set my biggest running goal yet. I was so excited to get out there and run those 100 miles. I started out with a bang, giving myself some wiggle room should something happen later on.

It turns out that was a smart thing to do because I caught a wicked reparatory bug not too far into the month. I wasn’t too worried though, I still had plenty of time to get those miles in and I had built in that wiggle room earlier in the month.

When I was able to run again I hit the ground hard. I was going to meet this goal come hell or high water!

Little by little my right knee started to bother me. It started slowly as a dull pain while I was running that came on after five or six miles. Within a few runs it was a debilitating pain that left me in tears. After my last run the pain never went away. Now it hurts to walk so running is out of the question.

My first instinct was to push through it and get the miles in, then come September I’d slow it down a little. Then I thought about the damage I may be doing…Permanent damage.

Sure, I’ll get those miles in now but will I be able to keep running later? Not to mention who wants to end every run crying in pain?

The moment I realized that I wasn’t going to make it to 100 miles was pure devastation. I don’t think I’ve ever been more disappointed in myself. Yes, I even cried.

Here it is, I missed my goal by 31.4 miles. I’m disgusted!

Now here I am almost two weeks since my last run and I’m starting to get a little depressed. I have an appointment with the orthopedist on Friday and I’ve promised not to run until he sees me.

I miss being out on the road with nothing but my music and the fresh air around me. I miss the feeling of accomplishment that I feel after each run. I miss flying over the pavement while sweating out my frustrations. I miss burning all those extra calories which allows me to have a little treat on run days. I miss running!

Have you ever been slapped in the face with an unexpected failure? How did you deal?

I dove into a box of red velvet cupcakes.