I’m prone to unlucky circumstances when traveling, I call it the Brown Cloud. The Brown Cloud is usually over my head whenever I travel away from home and my trip to Orlando for the Golf Industry Show was no different.
At least when the Brown Cloud struck this morning It was something I could almost laugh at, a comedy of errors.
Bill had to be up and out early, leaving me to sleep in and grab breakfast before I would meet him over at the trade show.
At a little after 7 I threw a sweatshirt on over my pajamas and down to the lobby I went to grab probably the most pathetic “continental breakfast” one has ever seen. I decided that I would have waffles, so I pour the batter into the waffle maker and close the lid. The stupid thing immediately started to beep…LOUDLY. I walked away, put a bagel in the toaster and grabbed a cup of coffee.
Ah the coffee.
Cheap styrofoam cup plus releasing the button late equals certain disaster. I pick up my cup and turn towards the still beeping waffle maker and burning hot coffee runs down my hand. Not just burning hot, made on the surface of the sun hot. Molten lava fresh from the center of the earth hot. MAGMA hot!
I may have let out a small squeak but I honestly don’t know because I was too busy seeing stars.
I head over to the waffle maker…which is STILL beeping away angrily.
By this time people are laughing, staring and coming over to help the stupid girl in her pajamas, with the third degree burns on her hand figure out how to operate the waffle maker. I begin to wrestle with the thing finally beating it into submission. Two and a half minutes until my waffles are ready.
Just enough time to realize how bad my hand hurts.
The only thing worse than being burnt by a cup of coffee is being burnt by a bad cup of coffee and that cup was the worst I’ve ever had. Take a cup of dirty dishwater and drink it and you’ll have an idea of what I was dealing with.
I returned to my room and as I examined my burnt fingers I had decided that enough was enough!
There was a Starbucks half a mile in the opposite direction of the convention center. A mile was a short distance to walk for a decent cup a coffee to help heal my burnt hand and bruised ego.
I showered…with one hand since the water burned my already burnt hand, got dressed and headed off for my Venti triple skinny vanilla latte with light foam.
Two and a half miles, and a trip to CVS for some burn cream, later I arrived at the trade show with my rather large cup of coffee, feeling triumphant and ready to start the day.
There is very little that a Starbucks latte won’t fix for me. See you later Brown Cloud.