This shit is hard! It always has been too. From the time the morning sickness set in when I was pregnant with Cameron its been hard.

Before I go any further, let me say that I wouldn’t trade my boys for anything and I love them more than I ever thought possible. It is possible to be willing to jump in front of a bus for something or someone and still acknowledge the struggle.

Pregnancy

I was NOT one of those glowing women who just adored being pregnant. I was big, like REALLY big. I was uncomfortable. I was generally miserable. My first pregnancy was when the insomnia started, I can still remember wandering the house all night feeling panicked about becoming a mother. And the hormones, oh the hormones, I’m not really sure how anyone close to me survived.

Labor and delivery wasn’t a picnic either. Cameron’s head was so ginormous that he nearly ripped me in half. Logan was kind enough to take so long that the epidural ran out just as we were getting down to the nitty gritty.

Babies

I don’t function well on little sleep and those boys had me up all night and then most of the day. They also had no interest in nursing which only made me feel like more of a failure as a mother.

Worrying that I was going to break them, especially Cameron (since he was first), was something always in the back of my head. The constant worry that I wasn’t feeding them the right foods. Or that I was dressing them too warm or too cold for the weather.

Then there is the amount of work that goes into babies. So much laundry. So many diapers. The constant feedings. The playing and stimulation that goes with helping their little brains develop so they can get into a good school someday.

Children

Every time one of the boys would fall down I’d hold my breath. Was he hurt? Is he going to cry? Would someone see all the bruises this kid as acquired and think I was beating him? At one point Logan had two ER visits with head injuries within six months of each other. I thought for sure that CPS would be knocking at my door.

Diaper changes since neither of them decided to potty train until I forced it on them at the three and a half year mark. Being peed on. Catching shit in my bare hand. Changing dirty underwear a thousand times a day. I couldn’t wait for them to be potty trained, certainly life would be easier then.

HA!

The fighting and the biting between the boys (who are two and a half years apart in age) was almost more than I could handle.

Tweens

OK, they can wipe their own asses, it’s time, life will be easier. They no longer need me to provide everything that they eat, they’re more self sufficient, life will be easier. I have two kids in school all day, life will be easier.

Nope. The old difficulties were replaced with new ones. Bigger kids. Bigger problems.

Learning to navigate the internet with these children who have almost constant access to it. Dealing with them being influenced from the environment outside our home. Friends and peer pressure.

The beginnings of puberty…Need I say more?

The fighting and sometimes biting still didn’t stop.

Teens

This is the part that no one could have prepared me for. The sights. The noise. THE SMELLS!

Their education has become more important. In middle and high school grades matter a lot more than they used to. Will they go to college? Will they be able to get in? About the only thing I do know if that it’s paid for…Thank the good lord for my parents!

Now we have girlfriends and social drama added to the mix. As if all of that wasn’t difficult enough, we’re doing all this during a global pandemic.

Cameron will be able to get his learner’s permit in just a few short months. Then I will have the added horror of that child behind the wheel of a car. The saying Jesus take the wheel has never felt more appropriate.

Little kids, little problems. Big kids, big problems.

Like I said, this shit is hard! If you’re just starting out on your parenting adventure, I’m here to tell you that it’s not going to get any easier any time soon. Buckle up, you’re in for a bumpy ride.

Do you have adult children? Can you tell us, does it ever get easier to be a parent? Please let us know in the comment section on on social media. We all want to know, is there hope?

I’ve been trying to read more lately. Remember back in the day when I’d read 30 plus books a year? The past few years I feel like I’m lucky if I read 30 plus pages. Damn full time job always getting in the way.

I decided to make reading a priority again, something I can do not only to relax and recharge but also to better myself.

Enter the self help books

While listening to my favorite podcast a few weeks back, Jen told us about a book that was pretty life changing for her. It definitely sounded like something I should read.

I logged on to Ebay and ordered it from one of the bookselling charities I like to frequent. I was very excited when, few days later, I received shipping notification. Watching those tracking updates like a crazy person, I was so excited when I saw the book would be waiting for me in my mailbox when I returned home from work.

When I ripped open the package this is what I saw.

The book I actually ordered was Think Like A Warrior: The Five Inner Beliefs That Make You Unstoppable. Clearly they weren’t even close with this one.

As I’m sure anyone who knows me can imagine, the first words out of my mouth were, “what the fuck?”. The very next thing I did was tear through the packaging as if the correct book were hiding somewhere in the empty bag. I opened the book and closed it again thinking that maybe I had read the cover wrong. Next, I flipped through the pages, clearly the cover on this paperback had been replaced. I looked at the packing slip, the correct book was listed so I did what any normal person would do, I picked up the book again because it had to be the right book..IT HAD TO BE! Alas, it was not.

I emailed the seller right away.

Hello! Unfortunately I was sent the wrong book. I’ve been happily married for nearly 17 years but I really need to know how to think like a warrior! Please help!

Thankfully they responded quickly and got the correct book out right away. They told me I may keep or discard the book they sent in error. I think what I’m going to do is find one of those book bins they have all over town and make a donation. Maybe some young lady will be able to use it to, “build herself a happily ever after”. You know, because you have to have a husband to have one of those.

Have you ever been sent the wrong product? A product that was so far from what you ordered it left you scratching your head while you laughed out loud? Tell me about it!