Tag Archives: dog

My Dog Is Kind Of An Asshole

4 Mar

Cooper is an ass

Don’t get me wrong, I love him to death. I love him with the unconditional love you save for your children or maybe your husband. He’s a vital part of our little family.

But Cooper can be a huge asshole.

He barks at everything! A gust of wind makes a noise outside and he jumps up and starts barking. The train whistle blows and he starts barking. Someone knocks on the door and he looses his mind barking.

Alright, maybe not every single time these things happen. It’s usually when the house is quiet and I’m totally engrossed in something…Like General Hospital or taking a shower.

Cooper hates my neighbor with a red hot passion. Every time he sees the guy he growls and barks at him like some kind of psychotic Cujo. The other day my neighbor stopped by (after dark) to drop off a package that was left at his house by mistake and I swear Cooper tried to bite his kneecaps off. It was kind of embarrassing really embarrassing.

The dog finds a way, nearly every night, to keep me up and ruin my sleep. If it’s not snuggling as close to me as he can with his hot little body, he’s sitting at the end of the bed scratching and making all kinds of noise. I have a king size bed and there have been nights when it’s just me and Cooper in it and I’m somehow left clinging to the very edge, just inches from hitting the floor.

Cooper has no issue pooping in the house. To his credit on this one, he usually does it in the boy’s bathroom so at least he has the right idea. He screws around when I take him out, sniffing the air or trying to chase the deer, then he comes inside and poops. Thankfully he’s only ten pounds so his turds are small and easy to clean and of course it’s nice that it’s in the bathroom and not on the rug somewhere.

Oh, let’s not forget about that time he locked himself in my truck WITH the keys and the police had to be called.

He’s a little dog who thinks he’s huge and wants to kill anything that he sees as a threat to his family…Which is just about everything.

Cooper is kind of an asshole.

But he’s MY asshole and I love him very much. He’s my sidekick. He cheers me up when I’m feeling low. He keeps me company when Bill travels and I’m lonely. I know Cooper will always be my pint-sized protector, just like I will always be his loving mommy.

Cooper is an ass

Do you have a dog that can be an asshole from time to time? Tell me about your poochie.


Preparing For A Major Bone Shortage

9 Dec

Cooper continues to be an important part of our family. It doesn’t take much for him to make me smile, really all I have to do is look at him.

Lately he’s been making me laugh.

When Cooper first came to live with us I got him some busy bone things, mainly to keep him busy when he’s locked in his crate. He loved to eat them and they didn’t keep him busy for long because he ate them so fast.

Since he loved them so much I bought him a Costco sized bag so he’d have plenty to enjoy.

A couple of months ago he stopped eating them and started hiding them. I’d give him one and he’d take off running, ears back, with a guilty looking stride. I followed him to see what the hell he was doing and he was “burying” his bone in a corner. If he saw that he was followed he would look distressed as he grabbed his bone and ran off again.

The other morning Logan came down and showed me what he found in his room while he was cleaning, it was one of those damn busy bones. Logan had left it on the floor in the family room and next thing I know Cooper has it and is hauling ass upstairs. I quietly follow and find him in the office “burying” his bone in a corner under a workstation next the drone.

Cooper's Bones

Hopefully he didn’t damage any of the drone props while burying.

I couldn’t help but laugh and wonder just how many of those bones are hiding throughout the house. I went on the hunt to see how many I could find, but of course I never let him know when I found one.

I was able to find four others throughout the house.

Cooper's bones

The top two squares above are bones hidden in the dinning room, the bottom left is behind my bedroom door and the bottom right is behind the office door.

Cooper is clearly worried that there will be a bone shortage, so he’s hoarding. Maybe he’s stocking up for winter? Could he be part squirrel?

What funny things does your dog do?

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